« New Yorkers Prefer Work To Handouts. Liberals Stymied. | Main | More 9/11 911 Tapes Found »

Scientology Gag Made Manifest

Duct Tape Sweet Xenu of the Galactic Confederacy, this story just gets weirder and weirder.

According to insiders, cult follower Tom Cruise has procured a special adult pacifier for his baby mama Katie Holmes, to ensure she follows Scientology's dictates of a silent birth.  Cruise and a team of Scientologist handlers have kept Holmes laregely isolated from the media, family, and friends throughout much of her pregnancy (discussed previously here), but this is more than a little sick.

It's a specially crafted adult pacifier, reports Star magazine.

"He commissioned an adult-sized 'binky' for her to clench between her teeth, hoping that it'll squelch her screams," a source tells the mag. "In keeping with a Scientology silent birth, Tom is prepared to do whatever it takes to muffle Katie's moans and groans during the delivery."

Cruise's PR rep, Arnold Robinson, denied the existence of an adult pacifier.

Yes, well, we know all about PR reps, don't we?

Star also reports that Holmes - with Scientology minder Jessica Rodriguez often at her side - has been spending long days at the Celebrity Centre in Hollywood and is under pressure to renounce her Catholic upbringing and fully embrace Scientology.

Yeah, we know all about those long days at the Celebrity Centre too.

Can someone kindly dispatch an FBI team to storm this place?

Previously:
Return to Konspiracy Korner - The Strange Transformation of Katie Holmes
Sciento-logic
Konspiracy Korner - Did Chef Really Quit South Park?

Handcrafted by Flip on April 5, 2006 |

TrackBack

TrackBack URL for this entry:
http://www.typepad.com/t/trackback/396377/4609813

Listed below are links to weblogs that reference Scientology Gag Made Manifest:

Comments

This story would be much more interesting if any of it was true. Quoting tabloids is like exhaling second-hand smoke. Sincerely, Greg Churilov http://www.liveandgrow.org

Posted by: Greg | Apr 6, 2006 9:12:42 AM

Greg, I'm glad you commented. I see from your website and your blog that you are a practicing Scientologist. A lot of my readers would be interested in learning more about what actually goes on in a typical Scientology training center during the auditing process. Assuming you've gone through this, can you give us any insights? Thanks, Flip

Posted by: Flip | Apr 6, 2006 9:25:50 AM

People make fun of all religions, but Scientology seems to be highly sensitive to any form of criticism or mocking (not that other religions are great at taking it on the chin, but you have to admit that scientology is extremely sensitive.) when you couple that with the secrecy that surrounds the religion, and throw in some high profile adherents, then it becomes an easy, and humorous target. Check out this site, http://celebrityreligion.typepad.com. Perhaps scientologists should grow a slightly thicker skin....

Posted by: charlotte | Apr 9, 2006 10:19:53 PM

Hi Flip. Sorry it took me this long to reply - I didn't run into this story again until just now. The Internet moves in mysterious ways, I guess. In terms of your question, what goes on daily at a Scientology center is that people take courses to improve areas of their lives, and a few train as professional Scientology practitioners. This takes place in the Academy. A Scientology Church also has a Library, where anyone can come in and read any Scientology book free of charge. There is a Bookstore, there is a cafeteria and there are several places for Scientologists to meet, hang out, and plan social and civic activities (such as volunteering, toy drives, literacy programs, etc.) There is an Auditing center as well. Auditing is Scientology counseling. It's different from psychology in that the counselor does not tell you what to think, but instead uses a leading-style type to get you to focus on areas of trauma or negative emotion in order to resolve it. Most Scientologists describe auditing as extremely beneficial in their lives. Anyway, on Fridays there is a Graduation ceremony, where the people who have completed courses that week share their stories. That's about it. Sorry, I know it sounds a lot more boring than what you read in the tabloids. Oh, in terms of the Scientology Silent Birth method: I found a website that describes it: http://www.silentbirth.org best, Greg Scientologist and proud of it http://www.liveandgrow.org

Posted by: Greg | Jan 14, 2007 10:38:45 PM

Post a comment